can i get a valium, please?

yea, this past weekend was truly insane. but we survived and we have memories to keep. the baby shower i was hosting couldn't have gone more wrong. first of all the space that we had rented was FULL by the time i got there at 10 am to set up. turns out a tennis league was having a tournament and BBQ. yea, i almost lost it at that point, but i thought, OK let's make it work. So, i began setting everything up and just as I was getting ahead, a thunderstorm started to roll through the neighborhood. Johnny and i were trying to do a bunch of last minute things like getting food, setting up the badminton net, putting up decorations, etc etc while waiting for others to come help us and waiting for balloons and then the mother-to-be shows up with her extended family just as it begins to rain. i had to run out and pick up some food specifically requested by the pregnant woman and while i was gone they decided that this outdoor party was going to become an indoor party - at my house. so, while i was out and in the pouring rain, my pregnant friend and her grandparents and in-laws MOVED the entire party to my house a few blocks away. I raced home and began to set up the food (all the while impressed at how they managed to move everything AND decorate my living room) and giving directions to all of the lost guests who went to the park who evidently didn't read their invitations which said "if it rains, we'll be at heather's house at .....address". then we began to run out of space - no tables or chairs - everything was wet, and nobody knew each other. we had no indoor games planned and one guest who was deathly afraid of balloons (which was the only thing we had to entertain with). yeah. and i didn't get to shoot a single picture.

i felt like i had completely failed as a host. but damn, the food was good and there was plenty of it and that's all people care about, right? yea, it wasn't so bad in the end because we all got together and were able to dote on the parents-to-be a little bit... afterwards, johnny did much of the cleaning and we went to bed completely beat.

unfortunately, i got one of my monster midnight migraines and didn't get any sleep. the very next morning, bright and early, my mother began stalking our house. i could tell because the dogs were whining and i knew she was anxious to get started with the errands of the day. i had to drag myself out of bed with as much will power as i could and face my mom with a smile on my face. you have no idea what this takes.

then we drove out to duluth to pick up a ginormous screen for the powerpoint presentation during her speech. it barely fit in the mazda and we took it to the restaurant. then we went to dim sum, which was actually nice. then we went home, i re-wrote my mom's speech on flash cards, downloaded pics from her camera, and demanded a nap before my head and chest exploded. I got almost 2 hours of rest and then it was up and at 'em until 9 pm. we went to the restaurant with cameras and flags and once we got there my mom tells me the address on the invitation was wrong. so i had to go find out where everyone was going instead and see if i could direct them to the right place. what a fucking nightmare. my mom started looking disappointed and so i started calling all the american people on her guest list to give them directions. then they started with all the speeches and introductions from chief of staffs to secretaries to president of this firm and that firm... all the while we are anxiously awaiting the arrival of the mayor. who was late. finally she arrived and people began to eat and things started to be OK. then we had to wait until everyone left and take the stupid screen back to my mazda, along with giant bouquets of flowers, and go home. i still had to shower and get ready for work the next day. thank god i was able to get some sleep with no headache, even though bibi instisted on sleeping on top of me all night.

throughout all of this, i had an expanding pressure in my chest that was making it very difficult to do anything. i was so mad at myself for having this stupid problem. i did not have time for chest pains at all. i don't know whats wrong, i dont want to take prevacid and risk a freaking heart attack. what a bunch of bullshit. today its not so bad but i have to take it easy. my body has completely refused to let me deal with stress at all.